Thinking of you deanyya. You could have just given yourself completely over to the liquor, gotten hammered, hungover and continued to drink for days on end but you didn't, you came back here and released some emotions you have been holding in. I know I sure am tired of holding in my feelings and actually that alone (just up to my ears with stress, some of it due to me "allowing" others to walk all over me) is a huge trigger for me.
Not saying it's a great thing to be in tears on a regular basis, but maybe if we all "ugly cried" a little more often we would release these stressful and uncomfortable feelings.
Do you know what triggered it, and do you remember what your AV convinced you of before you stopped at the store? I would be interested in knowing if you feel like sharing.
Friday night my ex had my son, only the second night I have had to myself since I became sober on sept. 7, and my AV was in overdrive. Telling me just tonight, just until I get to the happy place and no further, maybe I'll get the small 4 pack of wine bottles that will help me moderate and I'll drink only two...
I fought the bugger off by asking myself how I would manage to moderate when I knew that was a long shot, and I didn't want to buy cigarettes (only smoke while drinking) and knew if I did buy cigs I would use as an excuse to drink until they are all gone, which could be all weekend. Then I decided I had told myself I didn't want to waste a weekend feeling like crap and finally the voice went away.
Anyway, just curious if you wanted to share what your trigger /AV voice was saying. I'm glad you're still here and the rest of the class! Welcome to newcomers as well!