Lost an awesome gf
Hi, I've never posted anything but I need somewhere to talk. I am 35 years old and an alcoholic. I've drank heavily since I was 18 years old. Never enjoyed hard booze. Just beer. But I drink 6 to 12 a day. I had a wonderful woman, married for 7 years, who is now a surgeon but she left me about a year and a half ago. Because of drinking. We have a beautiful 5 year old daughter together and I have custody of her 6 months of the year. When she is with me I drink much less...but when she is with her mom I party hard. In the last year I found a wonderful woman who let me and my daughter into her life. This last week she left me because of my drinking of course. Now I feel the worst guilt of my life because my daughter and her loved each other very much. I am a horrible person. Don't get me wrong. I have a good paying job and support and do anything for my kiddo. But I have let everyone down again. I feel like going away to a hole in the ground. I have hurt everyone in my life because of booze. I've gone to AA and do not like it at all. Hate being singled out. Never been this sad in life. Not looking for sympathy. Just need to write this.