Way to go NSI!
You know, I used to have a bit of anxiety going back 20 years just getting up and realizing I had to build a life and a foundation. I started to help ease this by smoking weed (hated booze, what??). I smoked before work, during lunch and after work and in the evening and at night. I'm in the engineering field, so, it actually helped me concentrate as well, believe it or not.
Then I realized, if I wanted make more money, I'd have to get a few new jobs as stepping stones. And with that comes drug testing. So, I quite smoking, and before I knew I had developed a taste for Vodka (oops). As time went on, I matured (late bloomer) and became more confident and develop excellent communication skills.
Then I started going backwards as addiction began to kick-in because drinking became a priority. It's ironic how drinking can help us hurdle (smoke & mirrors) problems in life, but then it slowly starts to take its toll and you begin having a hard time getting off of the ground and soon you're plowing into things. Heck, I started having anxiety at work!!! I would avoid people because my heart would start racing and I thought I was losing my mind. So, what eased my anxiety actually worsened it.
I related this to your lack of reasoning this morning for not wanting (perhaps) to confront reality. At least, that was my reason for the mask.
Once we quit drinking, we realize that we had already developed coping skills and that we are responsible individuals. However, when obstacle arise, the heart starts racing and we just have to stay cool and deal,
but we're not used that part without a helping hand. And you've never heard Jack Daniels say, sorry man, I can't help you, you've got to do this yourself. Hell, he's all in..."of course, let's do this together, oh, and get 5th this time, what if we run out of the pint, you know how you get"?
Let's all learn how to deal with reality again. And I personally want to hammer on the addiction part, that wasn't associated with my initial plan....
Thanks for bringing up the inhibition to face reality or deal. You really made me think about my struggles and how I got here.
Bless, and Stay Strong Septemberites.......