OK ... my son actually asked today if he could take me for the shot and the dr's appointment. Although part of it is his fear that I won't follow through and he has a lot of anger at me ... to me it shows he still cares enough to be there for me (and believe me, he knows if I choose not to do it his presence wont make it happen). I'm now 100% certain I'll follow through cause alcohol is has really ruined large parts of my life with long term effects and I want to stay sober
The neuropathy thing has really shaken me, and now I have such bad "tremors" even when months sober ... it's scary. But all I can do is stay sober and not increase the damage. My mom told me today that "essential tremors" run in the family regardless of alcohol ... I expect the alcohol use made it worse, but 5 people in the family had these tremors at 60 so I'm about 5 years ahead of schedule.
I went to our local farmers market to buy some peaches (not real great ones ... but I think they will be decent). It was a big step for me cause I tend to not go places cause the tremors embarrass me. OMG I'm only 55 and I sound like an 85 year old
I know I'm going to be ok ... just having some fear
I'll post by Tuesday latest to let you all know it's a done deal