Opio, I'm glad you went home and are seeing the therapist this week. Like cleanin said, maybe it was a wake up call for your wife? I'm more of a pessimist when it comes to people really changing who they are. I think after a certśin age, what you see is what you get. I'm not referring to making better choices or becoming a better person but personality traits are usually not changeable. Maybe since you've been on this journey, you've changed and your tolerance for certain things (your wife's behavior) has become intolerable?
I've noticed that my husbands behavior is much worse than I even realized because I was high all the time. Just a thought.
People grow and others don't...sometimes people get left behind in the process. Whatever you decide, do what's best for yourself and your children.
Thinking of you...