LucyGoose - I'm so sorry. You are not a broken record. This is the reality of what we're struggling with and its there bubbling under the surface if its not addressed. Were you camping with the same friends? I hope you weren't alone. Were the kids there? I'm assuming you all don't live too far from Tahoe - dd you drive him back to your home? Has he been in a full blown relapse since?
I am worried about you and the kids. Everyone around the alcoholic is usually willing to give the first few chances - work, family, friends. The support is there for you to get help. However, there comes a time when everyone starts moving forward without you, the job is no longer an option, the family and friends circle gets smaller and smaller and you're left alone. Do you have people you can go to and stay awhile - or even better, does he? Perhaps there are people in your alanon group who can be helpful in this phase of dealing with the alcoholic?
My mom was here this weekend and we talked and talked and talked like we normally do. We talked a lot about my drinking and how I've stopped and how proud she is etc. I asked her a bit more about my father and how she handled it. She told me that once she had started squirreling away money and that she was waiting on a tax return one year and use it to leave my father. He got to it first and had some flippant remark about her waiting for it, why she cared so much etc. She didn't leave him for a few more years after that. These situations, this disease are scary and will change people. He has to make the choice and commit to it. I think we've all had to sit a few out until we were stronger, like Bebetter said, the camping was too big a trigger.
I'm thinking of you all day today. Let us know what we can do.
Husband gets home tonight. I leave for my Leadership Retreat on Friday. I applied for this year-long program that focuses on professional development, community involvement etc. etc etc. It's a program that all of our VP's in our office have gone through. I found out I got in last month and our first retreat is Friday-Saturday afternoon. I angled for my own room (they had us sharing at first) because my Birthday is Saturday. I said, 'I'm never alone, I just want to be by myself and sleep for my birthday,' the woman was so nice and was able to get me my own space. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! College Game Day is shooting from my alma mater (I'm a big college football fan) on Saturday too so its shaping up to be a pretty good next few days/birthday weekend.
Have a wonderful Hump Day Ladies.
XO