I know I can't explain to others who haven't been through it. I would give anything to go back in time knowing what I know now. I can't.
Maybe it's best to leave him alone entirely until I can really get past the initial withdrawal phases - plus a month for good measure. I don't feel like I deserve to have friends right now. I don't want to put him through any more of this weirdness that I project when I'm drunk. When I drink, alcohol takes possession of my entire being. I'm not me anymore. I can see how that would be difficult to witness, even though I'm not what you would call a mean drunk.