Here is my feelings and I will tick a lot of people off but its my feelings.
No where.in the big book does it say " meeting makers make it." Nor does it say " these are the meetings we attended." It says " these are the steps we took" . The steps are a great blueprint but nearly the whole book was written by men during a different era. Its not perfect.
You have a right to your feelings. You have a right to express them. The world doesnt stop just because someone is trying to recover. She has a.moral obligation to you and your son and she needs to work out a balance. Making family dinners a priority can go a long way towards all of you healing. Her telling you of her plans to do things with your son should be a common courtesy. Perhaps she is trying to reconnect with your son and thats good but she shouldnt hide it from you.