Hi redatlanta he never had affairs I accused him of it as I couldn't understand why someone would want to sneak off in the middle of the night to drink or spend all night drinking and for me that was the obvious answer oh and he didn't want to be with me!! Sometimes I think it would have easier if he had an affair, not nice but able to understand rather than addiction where there is no sense. What you said and what others have said makes a lot of sense, I was living on the edge, never knowing when his next binge would be, what mood he would be in and so on. It is nice to sit and not worry why he's in a bad mood, how much he will drink, I can go to bed and not worry if he will sneak out, come home, I'm not up all night worrying trying to contact him or if I fall asleep weakening with a start and jumping out of bed to see if he's come home and is passed out on the sofa or waking up and him not being home. It's nice to not worry about his mood when I come home from work or rushing home to make sure the kids have done their chores so he doesn't shout. Your right I was living on the edge. My home is more relaxed, my anxiety is settling, as long as I stay no contact.
Amy that's brilliant that you are doing so well
Pippi I need to do more fun things