Originally Posted by
NWGRITS 
Quack. That's all I see when I read the whole OP. Quacking from both sides. He's a dry drunk and NPD who will likely never get it, and you're still playing ostrich. Time will tell what? Time has yelled, screamed, and taken out billboards to tell you a TON. You choose to wage it off and continue to live in this deplorable situation. Your son is being bullied by his own father and you just let it happen. Really. What more do you need to gtfo?
My friend, I think everyone here moves at their own pace. Lizatola may be at a different point in her own recovery.
Edit: Step 9 can also be more about actions and or behavioral changes than words. So while the AH doesn't really amend the way we want him too, I'm going to give Liz some praise for keeping her mouth shut.
It's a lesson I've been working on myself and I'm willing to bet that all our qualifiers have done "deplorable" things.