(((jjj)))
I am so sorry for your loss, and it is a great loss to lose a baby to miscarriage. I am sorry you didn't have lots of support to help you through the tough times. It's okay to grieve, it's healthy to release the pain, but you are wise not to linger in that sad place too long.
MamaCas, I have been as crazy as you, and I think when we do that what we are really looking for is validation...validation for our anger and disappointment and hurt.
Oceanlady, thank you for your sweet thoughts. I'm not going through a sad or difficult time, it's more that I have been carrying this useless baggage of resentment around with me far too long. Like a bag of rocks it just wears me down and serves no useful purpose.
I bought some lovely big white hydrangea for my garden today, lovely big white flowers that will continue blooming until September. That's the reward I have promised myself for doing the work I need to do to rid myself of resentment once and for all. I CAN be bribed, lol, and I just bribed myself today.
Like worry, resentments serve no purpose and just rob us of all serenity. No more...not for me.
Hugs