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Old 07-17-2014, 08:01 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
SparkyMcSparky
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
 
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
fini, in your last post, you really do speak about the duality of human nature. I also view this as compartmentalizing - mental illness is present in many addicts (either as a cause or an effect), and compartmentalizing our thoughts and feelings is a way to cope.

In many ways, I believe most addicts do have a dual personality. Even though it is a part of their self, I view my AV as an external agent, just like beets and spaghetti. Or as a cancerous tumor in my body (in this case brain). Co-existence is not an option for me - the AV must be fully subjugated until it decides it would like to take up a different residence, or dies.

See, at least in my non-sober world, I compartmentalized my drinking. I knew I shouldn't drink, I felt guilty about drinking, and I knew I also had the power to stop if I really chose to. These uncomfortable feelings were then consciously walled off - it I was unable to do so, I could not have drunk, or done many of the dozens of other debasements that I did while drunk.

The semantics of calling it a "beast" or "higher self" are easy to grasp concepts that should appeal to the layman recovering addict. However, these semantics highlight not faith concepts, but clinically observed psychological concepts used by addicts to allow themselves to engage in behaviours they consciously know they should not be. The "higher self" and "beast" are tools used to explain human psychology.

SL, I agree with your statement as well. Someone can make a statement about the future which is truthful. Water will be wet tomorrow. I will not drink tomorrow. Both are factually correct.

And to my mind, making such assertions causes one to focus on this strong and absolute thought as part of their recovery. Compare "I will not drink tomorrow" to "I probably won't drink tomorrow", or "I'm guessing I won't drink tomorrow".

Nothing wrong with holding yourself to a high standard.
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