carguysgirl:
I am sorry that your BF doesn't acknowledge a problem. I guess, from the mom side, I have really tried to help my children. Often, helping to much was a problem for myself and their dad. Now, we really quit assisting them in food; rent; cars; money. In fact, we have disconnected from the phone calls that are dramatic/chaotic/manipulative.
It wasn't until we changed our behaviors did they begin to see that they may have a problem. It's hard to deny, on their part, that there is problem when your family barely speaks to you; you don't have stable housing/food or a stable job. In fact, the pain is quite motivating.
The problem is we (loved ones) often get in the way of their bottom. We have fears of it being worse...way worse! Sometimes it is worse.....it's part of letting go and trusting in God (for myself).