Interesting thread! This is SR, and the S means "sober" so there's a "party line" involved. I don't want to be dogmatic, and there was a discussion a week ago about moderation that was based on an article that looked a little dodgy upon further review. I'll concede that it may be theoretically possible for a "true alcoholic" to rehabilitate him/herself into a 'normal drinker' but I've never seen it actually happen.
To be honest I'm not sure what the goal would even be. Did you like just having one or two in the past? I never did. I didn't understand this until much later, looking back on my decades of drinking, that I never wanted just a few. I always drank to get drunk even if I didn't admit it to myself at the time. In the way that you "intended" to only drink one bottle you admit that you bought two, so what did you plan on doing with the second? Save the drive tomorrow? Most likely your Beast/AV was coaching you to be sure to have enough since nothing ruins the party like running out of poison!
I dunno what to say, really. I'm not quite two years into sobriety not twenty like you, so we're in different places. Now I don't really miss drinking but I'm pretty sure one drink here and there would quickly escalate to blackout drinking.
Biggest issue, at least for me, is that playing at moderation is courting complete ruin for such a trifling reward. It would be like playing Russian Roulette with a grand prize of five dollars.
