He's 14? Well shoot, he's just warming up on the teenage angst thing where everything is unfair and you're so un-cool. Do you live in a state where he has the right to request which parent he lives with? Unless the court has proof that your ex is a totally unfit parent, you may not have a choice but to let your son go. Depends on the location. It's a hard decision to make, I'm sure. I dread the day that my kids say they want to go live with the exhole. He doesn't sound a lot different from yours.