Yeah my thoughts are probably because I don't know where to get my sense of escape and relief from now. I think I have to realise that I'm never going to get that abandon from anything natural. Although now that I think about it I was snorkeling at the weekend and I didn't think about anything much. Once I had an intrusive thought and I remember thinking 'wow I've not thought about that all afternoon' maybe I just need to learn some new escapes
