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Old 06-23-2014, 01:17 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
MesaMan
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,472
Have Long Have You Got?

Man, there's some fine Posts and thinking going on here. Hence, my Post Title above. I can't write 'enough' on how well this sort of deep insight written above is working for me.

While glommed onto by certain Factions in our Culture for their own Political gain, I like aspects of the writings of Ayn Rand. The small Company Owner I worked for fo evah gave each Employee copies of her Book 'Atlas Shrugged'. My Wife also enjoyed it. When this gift happened >25 years ago, I dug in and read her other Works, and her unfinished bits, too. Amazing writing for a Russian Emigre for whom English was a Second Language.

As with this Thread perspective, her thinking aligned with mine first developed in my Teens. That one need not prostrate oneself before any Cloud Spook, and that all good can be derived from one's own thinking; introspection; and essential Being. To me, this Model answers the OP question re: the thinking one can adopt to make RR, and similar Models, successful. This thinking constitutes my 'Spirituality', internalized. 'Do no harm'.

In the present case, I am confident of controlling my own impulses once I recognized them for what they are: potentially destructive. As the old Joke from Borscht Belt Comedian Henny Youngman goes... A Patient goes in for pain experienced when lifting his Arm: 'Doctor, Doctor, it hurts when I do that'. Doctor: 'So, don't do that'. This is how I now approach Drinking. Henny Youngman: my HP. Cultures have been getting high fo evah. Further, I'm Genetically-predisposed to that Behavior. I keep this deep understanding simple, and don't beat myself up over it. To do so is just more Self-loathing, promoted by many formal Religions in order to exert control. Sorry, but no Victim of such thinking lives at this address.

With the help of Folks here, and derivative insights from RR/AVRT, I've fairly-easily compartmentalized 'The Beast', and can see it for the 'externalized' entity it is. The essential 'I' is someone else altogether, and can call out The Beast as req'd while not giving in like some Knee Jerk Neanderthal. No need to over-react to Triggers, any more than there is for this Concealed Carry Permit Holder to shoot someone who flips me 'The Bird' in Traffic after cutting me off. A really chilled Viet Nam War Soldier, and a Confidant in my Sobriety, taught me that event 'x' happens. A Booze Trigger, or a Traffic altercation. How you react to that objective event in time at some GPS-location spot on this Planet is completely up to you. We, and we alone, overlay an emotion or interpretation to a neutral, objective event: the specter, say, of a full Champagne Glass at a Wedding Reception.. Indeed, when you 'Knee Jerk' a reaction, you're actually giving that other Driver final power over you. And, just why is that again? The same with letting a Booze Bottle or a Social Trigger at, say, a Wedding have the ultimate say in how one behaves.

Old saying: 'He who controls your anger controls you'. Revise that to: 'Triggers that control your Drinking control you'.

The entire Model of needing to prostrate oneself to some Cloud Spook 'force' to maintain Sobriety is not something I can sit through in Meetings in order to gain purported benefits. It's painful and Self-crippling, frankly, to choke down that Model. It's 'anti' who I fundamentally am. As did Rand in her Writings, I flip that Model 180 degrees and reaffirm daily by direct action that I am the ultimate source to fix what ails me. Rational Recovery 'Guru' Trimpey takes this same approach as Rand, and has no use for Cloud Spook-based Recovery Models. Yah, he's a 'Family Values' promoter in staunchly outlining the Moral Imperative of not Drinking/Drugging, and I'm OK with that. It's an aside to the larger positive worth of 'his' Model where I don't hand my Recovery 'power' to any external Entity. They can come and go. I need internalized constancy and presence.

"Whatever gets you through the night. It's alright. Alright.' ~ John Lennon

Not being 'Recovered' unless you follow certain Steps rings as hollow to me as 'not being a good Catholic' unless you follow certain dogmatic - often oppressive - practices. I toss them both out the Window because I don't accept the core Dogma structure of those Models. I haven't for Decades. I'm more prone to gain necessary insights through Meditation. Including voluntarily following constructive Steps. Vegetarianism is a practice of the Seventh Day Adventist Dogma I was brought up with. While I'm not a Vegan, I certainly could see adopting Vegetarianism on the basis of it being good for me, and being a decision made by my own Rational Being. Skip the SDA Dogma, for me, and keep the good Health aspects of that practice.

While writing this at ~80 WPM, I thought of 'The Real Me' by 'The Who'. THEE most ferocious Band I've ever seen in Concert. Stunning. Very germane Lyrics to our individual Journeys here. As I watched this Vid Clip, the damage inflicted on the Band hit me. My Bass Hero, John 'Thunder Fingers' Enwistle, ODed in a Vegas Hotel Room Bed from a massive Cocaine Bender at age 57 just before starting a Tour. A legendary Drinker suffering from Heart Disease, he'd often have onstage 2 white Bike Rider's Bottles; one on either side of his Mic Stand. One contained Vodka. The other Red Wine.

Drummer Zak Starkey, the Son of Ringo and Actress Barbara Bach, occupies the Drum Throne left empty from 32 year-old Keith Moon ODing on 32 Pills of the Alcohol Detox Sedative 'Chomethiazole'. Recommended maximum dosage during his Home Detox was 3 Pills/day. Ringo and Barbara both Detoxed at a Facility years ago, leading to his Hit Song Lyric: 'No no no, I don't do that no more ~ I'm tired of waking up on the Floor'.

Pete Townshend used to down a Bottle of Brandy daily. After he Rehabbed, he wrote the Album 'Empty Glass' about his Alcoholism.

'The Real Me' ~ The Who

Even if my Model is a false Construct of my Mind, the inarguable fact is that my tailored version of RR/AVRT is working for me - the sole Person it need work for - ~5.5 months in.
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