Why some leave and then what happens
A few months ago, someone asked what happens to people that disappear from the forums. I can't remember what the responses were. I disappeared shortly thereafter.
For me, I left because I was good and sober. I had 30 days or so under my belt. I didn't think I needed the forums anymore, and I guess I didn't think I had anything to add.
Well, after being sober for a while, and away from the forums and all help, I did the one GD thing everyone says not to do. I started questioning if I even have a problem, and took a drink. Just one.
First I had one or two on a weekend. Then one or two during the week. Then one or two every day. Then three or four everyday. et cetera ad infinitum.
So, here I am again. I feel like crap physically and mentally. Defeated and guilty.
I'm sharing this for those of you who may be asking the same question I did: whether you really needed to stop in the first place. Well, my advice is to trust your initial instincts.
For me, now it's even harder to stop. So now I need to get some professional help through my company's EAP.
I should have just stuck to my guns.
Good luck everyone.