Hi Fandy.
No, not dropping the ball, just trying to get a plan that will not have to be 're-thunk', you know?
my daughter and I both agree... I need to insist on him getting professional help, not a job, because a job without help for his issues is a waste of time and effort.
I tried talking to him yesterday, by myself. He only said I was being argumentative, and he had no plan on talking to me about it... and said it all through his door.
I had visions of yanking him by the hair of the head and shaking the tar out of him, as my grandma would have said. Today, I told him that his refusal to talk, to co-operate , is going to have consequences, and it would involve having no internet.
basic outline is this.... He must go for counselling, and do whatever he needs to do to be able to be independent. If he does not do this, within a very short time, no more internet. No more phone-he can get a free one. He must apply for his food stamps until he gets a job.. that requires he go do the work program (*which would only be good for him*).
I hate to be without internet, myself, as I depend on it a lot, for support here and generally. online banking can be worked out. just the dependence I have on SR, I guess, will be the hard part. I live too far to go to daughters to use theirs daily.
but its important.
I have been depressed, due to what I see of my sons level of break from reality. I am sure he is addicted to some junk online. I know he loves his 'art' and friends , and that is his life.. but that is because he has broken away from society.
so , i have been down. but I am moving forward, with my decision. I do believe, more than ever, that I need someone to be with me when I talk. or he will just ignore and talk over me. It makes me so angry that I might break down his door, you know? He needs a smack in the face. He is not incapable, he is just a selfish , addicted jerk.
I have been wondering too, if he is doing some other drugs in there? his window is open all the time.. he wont shut it. I know pot when I smell it, and have not smelled it. He isn't acting weird, as if on crack or meth ,and has no unusual energy or look different.
I do think that he has given up, on trying. I think he is enjoying whatever he is doing , and ignoring me for as long as he can. He thinks I am helpless, I reckon. no wonder.
hugs and thanks for asking Fandy.