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Old 06-01-2014, 01:52 PM
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scintillady
Member
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 245
losing my resolve

Hi, as you know, I am on day 13, having started taking antabuse 11 days ago. I still consider it the "miracle drug" as I'm sure I would have lost my resolve this past weekend without it. As has been discussed in other threads, I'm really struggling with what I want to do now that I have a good chance of staying sober. I know I'm getting healthier, know I need to do this or I wouldn't have gone to such drastic lengths, but I really miss being able to sit on my porch and have a glass of wine while reading a good book, then go and cuddle up with my dog and drift off to a nice afternoon nap. I miss that warm fuzzy feeling that a couple of glasses of wine will give me, but then again I realize I rarely stopped at a couple. I'm at loose ends about what to do with myself. Luckily I can't make a spur of the moment decision, and probably this feeling will go away the longer I stay sober. I'm committed to keeping on taking the medication so I would have to REALLY make a huge decision at least 2 weeks in advance if I want to drink. I'm sure it will pass the longer I stay sober and the more used I get to sober life.
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