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Old 05-22-2014, 05:14 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Wendolene
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 77
I think you have described me there perfectly whilst writing that post, Mentium.

I think Joe has covered a lot of the major points, but a few things that tremendously help me:

Keep talking to people: Whether it's a fellow AA member, a partner, friend or family member, the worst thing you can do is bottle things up when they are becoming overwhelming. I've learnt this the hard way.

Keep your hobbies in your life: There are days when my anxiety has been so bad, it has been a struggle just to get in the shower or leave the house, so it is very easy to fall into the trap of not doing anything and letting the anxiety build. Personally, I find playing the piano, playing on my DS or doing some cross-stitching very therapeutic. It doesn't have to be anything really huge - just as much as you can conceivably manage. If you feel well enough to take up a hobby that is also a social outlet, then even better! Just anything that you can lose yourself in for long enough that your anxiety will begin to abate.

The last, and definitely the hardest, is - learn to accept the feeling of anxiety and allow it to sit with you for a while. This was one of the most useful pieces of information I learnt in rehab. Yes, it will cause an array of unpleasant physical sensations, and yes, you may believe you are in significant danger, but once you believe that they are not going to harm you, which they aren't, you are well on your way to breaking the cycle. My CBT therapist once said to me that you can only stay in a heightened state of anxiety for so long - your body won't physically let you indefinitely. The more I practice this, the more it is beginning to become apparent.


In answer to your more recent question, I personally believe that you can always break the cycle (e.g. with CBT or other techniques), but nature and nurture make it much harder for some than others. You just have to believe you can. I think a lot of my anxiety stems from my OCD, which comes from my perfectionism - I was bullied for many years in my youth, so was constantly finding fault with myself and feeling like I was never good enough. My mother is also an alcoholic, which I believe is a result of her own low self-esteem.
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