I think someone else mentioned it, but I think you should start documenting whats going on because I can almost guarantee she has someone in her ear telling her to write it all down, keep every text, every voice mail because she may need it. I think maybe you should contact an attorney for a preliminary discussion on your whole financial situation, custody of kids. Stay rational, think, plan. I dont want to sound negative about your marriage working out, but right now your wife is looking like a narcissist. When we have family counseling especially in the beginning there were assignments and activities to help us reconnect, regain trust, rebuild. We both agreed in front of the doctor to work in good faith. I feel sad for you ((DrSobrietist)), please stay strong and dont let this hurt your recovery.
On Saturdays maybe you could make it family day with your kids and invite her to come along. Movies, pizza, miniature golf, laser tag, or whatever they do for their age. Enjoy your time with them as much as possible and if she wont come along make it DADs special time with the kids.