O yes, I went through this too. When I began to detatch XAH threw fits about how I was not respecting him.
I calmly told him that respect is earned and maybe he needs to think that over. Not because of alcoholism, but because of who he is as a person, I will never respect him.
I have to remember this about my kids and myself too. If I want others to respect me, I have to earn that.
XXX