Hmm. I'm going to go a little astray from every one else. I think this is a very serious problem. If the two of you don't think you can pretty aggressively address this issue I wouldn't hesitate to seek some goal oriented short term counseling to address it. It takes two to fix couples communication.
My ex and I never fought. We were together for 15 years and I can honestly remember two fights - and they were not major. More disagreements really. Seriously. He didn't act crazy until after I filed for divorce. There is no good end to that. According to our counselor it was extremely destructive to us individually, the marriage relationship, and our kids in the long haul. Very dysfunctional. It was also, according to her, one of the easiest things to fix and we were at the end of the road when she said that - not happily married - so two motivated happy people would be a snap
