Originally Posted by
Hawkeye13 
I used to be happy drunk. I think "meaness" is a stage just like "functional" for many drinkers.
As the years passed, I drank more, got more negative, finally got where I was mean at times. Just like my alcoholic mother.
As an alcoholic who tried to "moderate" my drinking, I gently suggest to you that it doesn't work and the only thing that does is quitting entirely.
If you look over on the alcoholism or newcomers threads you'll see that over and over and over again.
I would suggest at least one year of total sobriety for your fiance before you even consider getting legally entangled with him.
It isn't that you can't support or love him, but you rightly realize that such support begins with caring for yourself and that includes protection from the fallout of his drinking.
It is progressive unless he commits to sobriety--at least it was for me.
Welcome to SR nysiren and I hope things move forward in a positive way for you both.
I hope he chooses to seek help, and I'm very glad
Yeah you touched on many of my fears if his drinking continues. I did talk to him and we agreed to go to a meeting this wednesday. He said that he is just going to stop drinking bc he would rather stop than deal with this every time. That's perfectly fine with me if he keeps his word, which is what I told him.
I guess we will see.
Im glad he agreed to go to a meeting.
Thankyou for putting it so blatantly. It helps to read and reread it.