Thank you Ann.
It was amazing when someone from here read over my list of things I was doing to "fix him" and only responded with .... paraphrasing "and what are you doing for yourself"!
Massive wake up call. Initially it made me so angry I wanted to throw my computer out the window. But with a good nights sleep, I woke up with the question in my head. Naked honest truth.
I was doing nothing for myself. And that was a horrible disservice.