[QUOTE=Ifnotforgrace;4545316]
Become Healthy attract healthy. No reason to ever date a smoker or a drinker these days-just rule those two out to begin with and save yourself some heart ache. Set those boundaries early, no need not too. Look for signs of immaturity, require honesty. Trust is more important than Love any day. In fact for real love to be reason trust is a prerequisite.
Thanks... Ifnotforgrace
I find myself very bonded to the alcoholic in recovery I just broke up with.
I did not know he was actively drinking when we started dating because he lied and said he was sober for 5 years.
He went to rehab while we were dating. But we broke up because he needs to focus on recovery and he is in meetings almost every night.
But... the lies...that is what is hurting. I still care for him and part of me wants to try again if he is sober a year... but the other part of me is just so upset about the lies and hearing the stories about how he has relapsed before and all the people he has hurt. He is so convinced he will never relapse again. I would be afraid that he would fall off the wagon and not tell me. I have no interest in monitoring his behavior.