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Old 03-31-2014, 09:28 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
HSSH
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 18
Hi Jaded,

All of us are in recovery. Sometimes something in our own lives makes it so that we acknowledge our shortcomings and that we can not have the impact we would like. It may be an illness, financial difficulties, or our own personal wounds from the past that we're still trying to deal with, to name just a few.

A number of us in Al Anon are also recovering co-dependents. Telling someone else what they should be doing with their life can be our "ism". We can become frustrated, depressed or angry when someone isn't doing what we think they should do with their lives. When this happens, our own recovery needs shoring up. Sometimes we need to walk away and refocus on our own work - it is not personal, although it can feel that way.

In my life, I've often noted that things happen for a reason (usually an HP reason) that I may not understand at the time, but later it gets oh so very clear. It's entirely possible that this sponsor is leaving you freed up to focus on what you really need for yourself and from a sponsor, to make way so a new one can enter your life.

If you have not picked up Melody Beattie's Codependent No More, it's a fantastic read. It can help de-personalize things that can feel so very personal when they happen.

This may sound odd, but there's anecdotal evidence that taking a pain killer (likeTylenol) at the end of the day when you've been rejected can help reduce the pain associated with social rejection. Fun fact: your body interprets rejection as a real and physical injury. Defend Your Research: Hurt Feelings? You Could Take a Pain Reliever... - Harvard Business Review
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