Originally Posted by
Liberator4EVA 
I've guess I've been isolated a lot.
This isolated state is a fallback mode i've had since early childhood, i can live that way indefinitely.
But i've no idea how to recover and properly rebuild my life.
I think I mostly isolate in a non physical sense, I withdraw into myself. I recognise this as something I did in childhood to avoid the feelings of guilt for either my parents drunken arguments or my mothers drink fuelled depression and sundry insanity.
Whilst I do could do that indefinitely it is not living as I understand it, or not living happily as I wish to.
I have little doubt that my childhood affected me in my past and influences my present, it is for this reason that I believe the 12 step group Adult Children of Alcoholics can help me recover.
M