Originally Posted by
NikNox 
I've actually just had a chat to my husband, and we've both agreed that we will not allow contact for a while. This woman is never going to change, we accept that, and she is never going to respect her granddaughter's wishes or her son's for that matter, so the best thing is to just stay away. Yes, that will annoy her and our names will be mud, but we HAVE to do what's best for SD, end of, and that is keeping her away from idiotic people who have no thought or care for her wellbeing.
After reading your most recent posts, it sounds to me like the MIL is deliberately sabotaging your efforts. You've really got to wonder what's going on there. I think NC or minimal contact would give you all a break. Prepare for some crazy when she realises she doesn't have her audience.
I think you're doing a great job in the face of difficulties and sabotage and I'm sure your SD will appreciate it as she gets older.