((wife))
Please know that you have to decide what is healthiest for you & your family ~
I just want to share my e, s, & h with you ~ I am in no way telling you what you need to do ~ just sharing what happened in my life & the life of my 5 daughters.
I was married a little over 16 years to an active alcoholic/addict ~ there were periods of sobriety but never for long and there was never sanity in our home. Never healthy boundaries or respect for anyone.
Because of that this is what my daughters learn:
It's ok for a guy to be disrespectful to you
It's ok for your mate to steal money from you or your children
It's ok for you to be the only person responsible for the financial obligations of your home
It's ok for your father to show up at your birthday, graduation, wedding or any other special occasion under the influence
It's ok to believe the same lies over & over again from someone, if they say they are sorry ~ even if they don't mean it.
Children learn what they see not what they hear ~ I know for me, I taught my daughters to tolerate unacceptable behaviors ~ How could I not expect that they would do this when they started dating?
A little over 10 yrs ago ~ I made the changes ~ I wanted something different and did something different.
The blessing is that I am beginning to see them start to make some changes to make healthier decisions too.
I know that for many years - together was what I thought was better ~ today for our situation I know that was not what was healthiest for everyone. I just had never thought about the long term affects of what the A's behaviors & treatment of us would do to them.
That's just my e, s, & h ~ please again know I'm not saying what is right for you - just sharing a different point of view for the family needs to stay together ~
Please take what you like & leave the rest.
Prayers & good thoughts for your family ~ that peace, hope, happiness, sanity & sobriety will be with all of you soon!
PINK HUGS,