This journey is not one of rainbows and Unicorns. Once we put down the alcohol, there is a great amount of learning that takes place. I went in and out of sobriety for many years, and I thought many different things through out those years. The thoughts were like this: I am not an alcoholic. I can handle this. I can moderate. I am an alcoholic, but its okay. All I have to do is put down the bottle. I cant live without alcohol. I can live without alcohol. I am worthless. I am stupid. I am strong. I am great. I am an alcoholic due to circumstance. etc....
The thoughts will come and go. Keep moving forward. I hear many thoughts throughout the day, but the one thing that i do not allow myself to do is pick up alcohol. You are not stupid. Yes, it is work. For me, this is a lot easier than where I have been. You are doing well. One day will be a lot easier than the next and vice versa. There is no right or wrong way on this journey, it is simply to abstain and to make that the priority.