Hope you don't mind me jumping in from the Friends and Family forum. I used to question the 'one-year relationship-free' suggestion too. I understand it now. My ex was in recovery for only a couple of months, attending AA, seeing a therapist, meeting daily with a sponsor, going to church, working out, doing fantastic healthy things for himself when he convinced me that we should give our relationship another try. I saw good things happening and believed it could work. It did, for a few months. It was amazing and we were genuinely happy. But then while things were good, he convinced himself that he didn't need his therapist any more, didn't need to meet with his sponsor any more, didn't need to go to church as often...and things started unraveling slowly.
Our relationship became the filler that he thought he needed. He quit working on himself because we were happy, life was good, and he thought that was all he needed. He quit working on himself. And we gradually fell apart. I love him still, but it will forever be from a distance. Too much painful history, no longer any trust. I will never know how things might have been different if I had said no to the reconciliation and had waited for at least a year of healthy recovery before going back.