Learning to trust my instincts again was huge for me. They were never wrong.
This is a great post by a very well educated poster.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-10-times.html
Sadly, relapses are all too common! It's not as simple as something like cheating on a diet. Once the pilot light is lit up again, it's very difficult for most to put out the fire. I am very sorry. I, too, know how much loving an addict can hurt.