I am sorry Tillymint. The meetings are good. It is hard to know someone can go so long then relapse. That is life with an addict. You will read on here people being sober for 20 years then relapsing. It's awful but a reality it can happen. It is something only we can decide if we can live with, the knowing it could happen again.
That being said, it is so good you have the knowledge to sit back and let him decide he wants to do this on his own. You are correct, it has to be his decisions.
I know it hurts. We are here with you.