Retrain your brain: It is easier than retraining the A (impossible) and is something we actually can control!
Aint that the truth.
Not out yet, but focusing on ANYTHING other than the A helps (even if you think you can't or simply don't want to). Find a new hobby, volunteer, clean house with a toothbrush, take a drive with loud uplifting music, be creative.
This may sound over simplified and other will likely say "well, duh", but yesterday I had an epiphany - would I allow ANY other person to treat me this way? I guess it was sort of a detachment moment because I quit looking at (r)A as a spouse and looked at him as just another person that is currently in my life and I would not tolerate his behavior and actions by any other person.