Hi SR friends
That was not a pleasant experience.
Me, my lawyer, xh and his lawyer & lawyer for the child.
Did manage to get a lot set down in writing & agreed upon but I still feel raw, cheated & robbed.
The way I want to schedule things with least amount of disruption on the childrens schooling & the way the XH wants to work it is not in agreement & will now go to a court hearing.
The lawyer for the child has taken the side of XH & that will go forward to the judge. Even my lawyer thinks the judge will pick that way.
What I want to know is how do these people (including my XH who has been abroad for 21/2 years) know what is best for the children?
I have spent the past 7 years raising them, putting their routine & schedules in place & living it & making it work & it has produced fantastic results in the children. All the lawyers agree with that & can't even get their heads around the schedule I adhere to.
So why change it?????
I am willing to cooperate & give more time for the children & their Dad yet I would like to do it in a way that I think will work around the schedule but they look at it on paper & how it looks on paper.
This is frustrating. I had tears at this meeting (only while in presence of my lawyer luckily), I stuck to my guns & wouldn't be forced into doing what everybody else wanted & don't I have a right to do that???
Yes I do but the lawyer for the childs recommendation will go to the judge & there is only a very very slim chance it will go in my favour.
I feel like I've lost already yet am not prepared to back down for what I believe in & feel even though it will probably rule against me & cost a whole heap more money, if I don't fight it the whole way & stand up for what I believe in then I will only be letting myself down because I have given up.
On a better note, I managed to get XH to now be responsible for half of the holidays & his regular weekly contact which I was all for will start next week.
What we are fighting over is the days. It's ridiculous. I wanted a midweek weds & he wouldn't agree because he wanted the ONLY day the children are not doing sports. To keep the peace & at the recommendation of the lawyer for the child I agreed to Wed one week & Thurs the next. Although not completely happy with that I think it is fair.
Now I wish I had never been kind & tried to keep the peace because now he wants to take the Thurs, Frid & Sat nights together. So the kids have school with Mum Mon Tues Weds & Thurs Fri with him.
I live one block from the eldest daughters new school. I work school hours.
Yet the court don't give a damn about that. All they see are changeover times & days. I see disruption in schedule & routine that we have spent years achieving & working for us.
I feel robbed, cheated & don't understand why this is happening to me.
I put my trust in God & my higher power & I am loosing faith.
Why do I get penalised & punished for always being there for my kids. Doesn't that account for anything?
I'm really mixed up & stressed right now.
Help.
