Well SD got a card today in the post from her mother. It just said happy birthday & that was it. It was posted on Saturday, the day of SD's birthday, and because SD didnt hear from her mum on her birthday, or yesterday, she believes it was kind of an afterthought, in that mum suddenly realised what the date was and posted a card, rather than remembering to send a card to arrive in time. She ripped it up and threw it in the bin. Which is sad.
But, secondary to all of that, we're having problems with my husbands mother. Long story short is over the years she has been close to SD's mum, protected her when she neglected SD & refused to help us get SD out of there, even though she knew she was being treated badly. We have never understood why she stood by an unrelated A to the detriment of her granddaughter. Anyway, she has remained in contact with SD's mum even after SD came to live with us, & visited her in rehab. SD hasn't liked it, and after she found out her nan had gone to see her mother in rehab she got really upset & felt betrayed by her nan. My husband told his mother that SD was upset, & his mum reluctantly agreed not tp.see her again & sent SD a text promising she wouldnt. The day SD's mum came out of rehab, my MIL contacted her, well she actually, accidentally called SD's phone by mistake and when SD answered she said "hello B". SD said "this isnt B" & hung up on her. Boy was she mad, seething with rage, and of course my husband called his mother to find out what the hellwas going on. She got all defensive & upset & said she was going to drop SD!!!! Anyway, we were shocked but left things for a,while, but did email her trying to explain why SD was so upset. She now says thar she feels,like shes being told what to do by her granddaughter & she feels like a naughty child. She just doesnt get that her loyalty should lie with her granddaughter!!
We're not going to bother with her for a while as its just too stressful.
Any words of wisdom appreciated xx