Originally Posted by
Dominica2 
I think I am at my wits end. I have betrayed the person I love most in the entire world. What is bad about it, is I don't even remember doing it because my dumb ass was in a blackout. This seals the deal. I can't keep doing this to him and to myself. I am not that person when I am sober. I am not a complete narcissistic ******* until I start throwing that poison down my throat. As soon as I drink I become the most selfish person on the face of the earth. This does it. I am done. I cannot believe the lengths of my stupidity. I need to get this under control and now before I lose the love of my life to a liquor bottle. Alcohol WILL NOT win. I wont allow it to control me anymore.
Nice to see you again Dominica. It seems like being honest with yourself and your partner will be the best way to approach this. I don't know on what level and how you will approach this, but he is deserving of an explanation. I do understand and know what it is like to make terrible decisions while under the influence. I know that people do not accept the simple truth of being intoxicated as an answer to what has happened. Your not wanting to lose and no one wants to lose. Considering that you have been battling with alcohol for awhile, what will be done this time to ensure that you are walking on the right path? AA, AVRT, SMART, LifeRing, SR, or any other form of recovery that will be implemented? How would you like to deal with this? If you were your partner, what would you want to know or hear?