Lillamy,
Loved your post because the brain also fascinates me on how it "tricks" us because it doesn't know any better! It's just an organ and chemicals that dumps how it has been trained to dump chemicals our whole life!
Have any of you been reading Dr. Amen's stuff? Change your brain and change your life and other books and articles? Controversial and it is all being sorted out but in the coming years we will be unraveling mysteries of our brains and our responses and behaviors with greater understanding.
It has always helped me to understand that what we "feel" isn't always what is true about ourselves or the situation at hand. Our perceptions our so biased by so many things and our family of origin and brain chemical responses in highly emotional relationships make it complicated.
Divorcing emotion and becoming more logical in reacting to the A's who are so toxic and manipulative because they KNOW exactly how to hit the buttons that cause our brains to dump the chemicals that get us anxious and second guessing!
When we know the brain is being "stupid" and our feelings are not valid or warranted can stop the chemical dump that causes the "feelings" or anxiety.
This has happened for me and I was one sick puppy and so entrenched with my XA that I still wonder at the insanity of it all. I am free... my brain has been retrained and I am good now! Daily reading here, alanon and just living a life of peace and serenity with my HP did the trick.
Time... time is our friend and stopping the brain in its tracks... what we think we become. Have to cast down the thoughts immediately and NOT entertain them to retrain the brain.