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Old 12-21-2013, 05:20 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
lillamy
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Grits, you know what I've discovered? (And I'm saying this because I know you're an ACOA and I'm not.) The ONLY time I obsessively second-guess myself is when it has to do with AXH.

For example -- he was supposed to get a copy of one of our kids' medical test results (don't ask me why, he doesn't know a thyroid from a hemorrhoid, but I digress). It was established with the lab that they e-mail it to two e-mail addresses, every time. Last two times, they didn't. And he's being paranoid and claiming I'm trying to deliberately keep important information from him when, in reality, it was someone at the lab probably thinking for themselves and going "I see no reason to waste 4 more seconds to type in a second e-mail address here" and that was it.

So do I see it that way? No!!! I have anxiety attacks about the next round of tests that we're doing this weekend -- what if they don't send them to him? What if he thinks I'm deliberately screwing with him? What if he takes that to court and gets full custody of the children (yes, because that'll happen *rolling my eyes at myself*).

My point?

It's the influence of the alcoholic in my life, the way I have incorporating his criticism of my every move, every thought, every action -- THAT is what's making me insecure and taking on the blame for everything on my shoulders.

Just thought I'd share that little bit too.
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