Hey Liz, you know what I think you should do?
(Yes, I am giving ADVICE and I'm not apologizing for it!!!)
I think you should give yourself a big high five and pat on the back.
You know why?
Because DO YOU EVEN SEE HOW FAR YOU HAVE COME???? There was a time when you (and I!) would have been jumping for joy over this development and said "YAY he has become the man I always knew he could be even though he's still drinking!" and then the crash when it turns out not to be true would have been that much harder.
Having realistic expectations saves us so much grief. And you have come so far and grown so much -- and having walked that path myself, I take great joy in seeing that. Not because I want your marriage to break up, but because I know the best thing we as family can do is detach and step aside. For us and for the alcoholic.
I admire your calm and your stubborn insistence that you will not do anything until you know it's right. That'll take you places.