Sorry I haven't been keeping up with your situation but I recall your AH is still drinking. Is that correct?
Is the separation based on a boundary of keeping an active A out of your life? Were you planning for this to be a trial separation, a time for your AH to seek recovery? or is this the end of your relationship?
It took me a long time to detach my actions from RAH manipulation and irresponsibility.
I think A's will always try to manipulate and not take responsibility no matter what.
It doesn't seem right for you and your son to be disrupted from your home unless it is the end and you are taking the first step to moving on.
Hope you do enjoy the holidays and yes whether you believe it or not enjoy what your AH is doing around the house, you deserve the help and he should take responsibility.