wanttobehealthy

xAH pulled some crazy $hit this time involving my family (crazy mother, enmeshed narcissistic sister etc..) since he knows I won't bite when he baits me...

Crazy mom emailed me Tues night (as I am already licking my wounds from not getting a job I really really wanted and needed) and tells me I can't bring my kids to her house for Thanksgiving (she had already uninvited me but I guess needed to rub it in some more?) and tells me she is "gravely" concerned for her granddaughters based on reports she is hearing.

Thurs, Thanksgiving day I run a race with my kids and my sister. xAH shows up. We all play friendly then I go home and my sister comes over for a bit with her family. It was pleasant.

Later in the day I start getting crazy texts from xAH which I ignore.

Fri my sister calls me SCREAMING telling me I am unstable and repeating as if it is fact, the BS that xAH was texting me the day before.

I reply and tell her a) to stop yelling (she tells me no, that it's time someone stop me and protect her nieces) and b) that if she'd like facts, she ought to speak to me and ask for facts...

She rants and rages and in drips and drabs I learn that xAH is making horrid, horrid allegations about my keeping the girls from him, that they are in danger, that I am suicidal, that he is afraid for my safety and the girls etc...

And in true f'ed up family fashion, my family of origin who have not wanted to be in my life or my kids lives at all for months and who have turned their backs when I have reached out for help, all apparently decide to just take xAH at his word and lash out at me.

So, I have made it clear to my sister and to xAH that their behavior borders on slander and it needs to stop and that much as I want my kids to have relationships with extended family, they will NOT be around people who are so toxic as to behave as they have in the last few days... That of course got me told that I need help and to please let people help me etc....

I am frankly TERRIFIED of the lengths that xAH will go to. My own mother managed to alienate my father from all 5 of my siblings with the same behavior that xAH is pulling. She got the courts to buy her tales and spent 10+ years dragging him into court and he finally just went away bc he couldn't fight anymore....

My family is so unbelievably sick and I don't know if they actually believe what they are alleging about me or if they want my kids for their image or if this is a way to get back at me or ????

I guess my mother expected me to beg to be there at Thanksgiving and when I didn't give a $hit and didn't reply to her emails, I have no doubt she enlisted my sister to be her by proxy abuser as she did when we were kids and they know that going after me as a mom and my kids is the best way to hurt me....

Has ANYONE experienced this level of crazy with family or x spouses and have any advice for me?

Obviously I am going NC with my family which really sucks for my kids bc they have had relationships with my mom, their aunt and their uncles and I have maintained those bc I wanted the girls to have extended family.... But at this point it just seems dangerous to continue to be around people who align themselves with an abusive alcoholic...