I wonder....this is just me speculatin' not trying to argue or speak over your therapist...but maybe the question should be worded;
what do you THINK is missing? cuz at least for me what I discovered was that nothing was MISSING, I only thought there was something or someone outside of me that I needed to MAKE ME feel whole. when in reality, I had everything I needed already....I just needed to take a good honest inventory. that by THINKING there was lack, lack was all I saw. only by changing my viewpoint and believing all I needed was already there in abundance, did I SEE abundance.
once we solve the "missing" problem, we can more clearly discern between wants and needs. maslow's hierarchy and all that. and even further the difference between "I'd Like..." and "I Want...." - I'd LIKE to go to Hawaii, hell i'd LIKE to go anywhere, as in on a vacation, however our situation does not allow for that....RIGHT NOW. I do notneed to go on vacation. if however I decided I really WANTED to go somewhere, that would require I take a lot of actions to somehow bring that into reality. that which we want, or truly desire, requires ACTION on our part....wishes are things we can whisper and then just hope they happen on their own.