Hi Kathy!
Welcome to the forum. There are a lot of really good posts here that offer words of encouragement and advice. Many of the people here have experiences such as yours, and thru their posts they share their experience, strength and hope. There is a reading list that suggests a number of good books, and I have to recommend finding a local Al Anon group. Going to Al Anon has saved my life. It doesn't make all your problems go away, but it certainly gives you tools to deal with the stuff that comes your way.
Keep posting and reading.... keep coming back
Hugs
Osier59