Kathy,
Welcome to the forum.
I've felt that way before. My son threatened suicide so many times that I just blew and told him to go ahead and do it because I was tired of worrying about it. We had a huge fight that day. All because he was drunk.
None of us are perfect and sometimes we snap. You have a lot going right now and no help from your other half.
I read your other post about your daughter. I do pray that she continues in recovery. There are a lot of mothers and wives here to offer you support. It helps so much to know you're not alone.
Please keep posting. We have sticky posts at the top of the alanon and naranon boards here. Please read them. There is a lot of good information.
Hugs,
MG