I do feel guilty. Even if I couldn't get her into treatment I should have insisted on a home care nurse. I shouldn't have let her go home to die alone. When she was here visiting me we argued and she cried and said "what if this is the last time we see each other? you're breaking my heart" and I said "this will be the last time we see each other if you make it the last time we see each other". But now I feel terribly guilty for making her feel unloved like that. I feel guilty for every time we fought. I feel guilty that I didn't drag her to detox and push her in. I feel like I hurt her and she felt abandoned by me at the end.