I don't praise my husband for each little thing he does right (when he gets out of bed to go to work that is called responsibility, I do it too, no on praises me for it). When he is making an effort I mention "I can see you are making an effort, that is good." That's about all i've got. I already feel as though he has become my third child and that I have to be the husband and wife for our family. How much more is expected of me? How much do I have to put up with to get this person well when they don't want to do it for themselves? Nope. I can see now that unless they have to make sacrifice and changes in their lives (motivation that they are going to lose things that mean alot to them) that they won't change. And even then many of them still won't. It's a very harsh but very true reality.