Liz-
I have been thinking about this post for a bit.
Unrelated to a lot of it on here I want to comment on something you mentioned about halfway through.
You stated you are angry with your therapist.
I wanted to clap my hands and jump up and down for you. You are feeling, you are in touch with the feelings etc. You are not letting the feelings "run" you per say, but they are making you sit up and pay attention. Making you look at if you should continue the relatioship with her or not (that I can't help you on, but when my therapist makes me angry usually some huge growth is the end result).
I just want to say yipee for your growth and recovery, regardless of what you decide you are feeling and starting to pay attention to those feelings.